Breach (6)

This slow film about an FBI investigation into one of its own agents for espionage works reasonably well, but I would be much more interested in what really happened, a documentary. It is still worth watching though to wet your appetite for the real thing - 6 (a slow drama of subterfuge and lies).

A trainee agent, O'Neill, is sent to work as the assistant to Robert Hanssen (Chris Cooper) who is a suspect for selling secrets to the Russians. O'Neill must take note of everything Hanessen does, and create diversions so that Hanessen's phone can be copied, and his car searched. He does by quick thinking, convincing lies, and with the help a large investigating team - they want to capture Hanessen dropping off secret documents. Hanessen's religion and the job causes stress and strain on O'Neill and his family.

This film is based on true story - but it really should stress the word "based". I imagine that the FBI and the characters are cliched in film because it fitted every cardboard cut-out image I have from other films. And upon looking at the case on the web, there is so much missing from this movie. Even if the real people were really just ordinary straight forward people (which they weren't), I would rather watch a documentary in this interesting case. And that is where this film fails, it takes something amazing and interesting, the biggest FBI spying breach ever,and makes it mundane and a little boring - how disappointing.

Dilemma (3)

I'm not sure why I chose to watch this 1962 film - it was chore. Just about the only thing I liked about was the 60's era stuff, but otherwise it's only a 3 (luckily I had something else to do during it that was more interesting - ironing - that's how bad it was).

A man comes home to learn from their nosey neighbour, that his wife ran out with a scream. He discovers a dead man in his bathroom and in devotion for his wife, proceeds to dig a grave in his living room to hide the body. Inevitably, he is interrupted numerous times and almost discovered by his neighbour, some nuns, a piano tuner and a boy. Meanwhile when the police begin questioning people on an entirely separate matter, the wife involvement is immediately, and disappointingly, obvious, so even the surprise ending is no surprise at all (I hate it when that happens).

It is a simple film with a simple story - a surprised guy is trying to get rid of body but he might get caught. The filming is in crisp black and white, but the cliches are thick and full - the constant interuption during the digging are almost comical, the nosey neighbour is straight the big book of stereotypes and everyone, but the main character, seem to be amateur actors. In fact, the whole thing takes place mostly in one room and this could almost just be a straight filming of their play.

Elizabeth - The Golden Age, 7

I'm not really a fan of royalty films; maybe I like cheering for the underdog and seeing them triumph. And so it was with this film set in 1585 in the royal court of Queen Elizabeth I. Still, it was better than I expected, 7 (as long as you enjoy sumptuous filming and stilted romances).

Queen Elizabeth (Cate Blanchett) is chased by suitors who want to marry her where all marriages are based solely on what political alliances it will form. However she also wants someone to love who is her equal. Then she meets the adventurous and exciting Sir Walter Raleigh, but he is an explorer and she can only hold him as a guest in her court and go no further. His womanising with other court woman, and her frustration with the freedom they have lead to her broken heart. Meanwhile, the Spanish are deployed a fleet a cannon toting battle ships which are heading to the Thames to conquer London and then rule the UK. Her own meagre fleet is losing badly, and even desperate measures, fire boats, are not working. Exciting battle scenes ensue.

The filming is rich, the costumes even more so, the sea warfare satisfying slow and artistic, the political maneuverings interesting, but still, this film is just a little too much stilted. Everyone's emotions is held in check, even in the Queens battle cry (I don't think Blanchett is very good at such things). In the court scenes every has a well defined, and strict, social status and role. It was the people who broke this, like the assassins, were the most interesting characters and lead to the very best moments, like the assassination attempt. Of course, there is probably next to nothing that is factually correct and because it is American, I half expected an American fleet to save the day at the end but for once, they didn't go that far!

Still, enjoyable - just don't expect a heart pounding adventure or romance, it is all slightly muted.

The Quatermass Xperiment (7)

I expected this to be a poor B-grade horror but it turned out to be nothing of the sort. Apart from being black and white and having some slightly poor special effects, it was great to watch. It's a 7 (this was a delightfully enjoyable surprise, sci-fi and horror fans will love it).

Quatermass and his team of scientists go to the crash site of the first space rocket containing people to rescue the astronauts. Inside, two have mysteriously vanished and the remaining live astronaut, Victor, is delirious. The police begin to investigate the deaths. But Victor is actually being consumed by a transmuting space beast - he smashes a cactus which is absorbed into him - and he escapes the hospital. The police, the scientists and ultimately the army are after the monster as is stalks it's way across London, either killing or absorbing other living things. It must be stopped before it infects the whole earth!

This old 1955 film has some poor special effects, but only some. Most are great and well done for it's time. This is not just a monster chase film - there is conflict between the police, who to kill investigate the deaths and then kill the monster, and Quatermass who thinks that the deaths are a worthy sacrifice for science and wants to the study the monster. The acting is way better than b-grade horror, in fact,this film is not in such a corny league, it is a-grade stuff.

Stardust (4)

Many kids films are made so that they are also enjoyable to the adults that the kids drag along with them. When done well, it is very successfully. Sadly, this kids film was strictly for kids and I found it a real chore to watch. It did improve after the first hour (and I had had enough to drink) but it still only rates a 4 (do not touch with a barge pole, useless you have kids).

A young man, Tristan, attempts to prove his passion to a village girl by going to retrieve a fallen star. The star has fallen on the other side of a guarded wall where he enters a magical world. In that world, witches are also after for the fallen star to restore their youth. And duelling princess are also after the star to retrieve the jewellery she is wear to win the crown. Yes, she.

The star is actually a beautiful young woman, Yvaine, who the witches want to cut open to eat her heart. As the princess kill each other, and the ghost numbers increase, and as Tristan and Yvaine races across the land to return to his village, they fall in love. After being welcomed on board by pirates, led by the big softy Captain Shakespeare (Robert De Niro), Tristan and the witches and the last prince battle it out.

The story was simply not interesting at first for me. It was a gruelling hour before anything of any real interest happened. I would have stopped watching it except for the filming and effects which were very well done. At after with pirates, the story become more compelling but still not quite enough to sustain the film. They eye will delight anyone, but the story will bore everyone, even kids who will only grasp little bits here and there. It seems that well known actors were used just to give it more gravitas but in their silly roles, it fails badly, except for one, Michelle Pfeiffer as the lead witch is good.

Death Sentance (8)

Death Sentence is a riveting and exciting decent into one man's hell as his safe, comfortable world crumbles. It's a common plot of a persons life being shattered and them then seeking revenge, but this is done cleverly and leading to frantic action scenes. It's an 8 (a gripping piece of entertainment that is superbly crafted).

Nick Humle is a a middle aged, middle management man who is a stickler for rules, but when a gang member kills his son his world starts to fall apart. It transpires that the murder was just an initiation for gang membership, and when he learns that the prison sentence is going to be short, Nick changes his testimony and the guy walks free. As Nick's anger and frustration builds, he goes to confront the killer and in a scuffle, kills him. The gang discover that Nick killed their member and target him for murder. But in a thrilling car park chases and fight, he kills another. The police are suspicious that he has started a gang war but he tells them nothing. The gang then attack his family and Nick finally knows what he must do - end the gang war by entering a world he knows nothing of - guns, drugs and ghettos.

Firstly, the filming is great! There are great wide angle lens shots, dark saturated blacks and some sort of sharpening process applied that gives it all gritty feel, and some neat angles too. The acting by Kevin Bacon (who I'm not really much of a fan) and the gang are just right. Even the gun running gang leaders father played by comedy man John Goodman is no comedy at all, but convincingly scary. The action action is exciting, particular the chase the car parking building which has been so many times before, but hardly with such shear panicked terror.

There are a few negatives, the plot is not very original, and everyone seems to be slightly super human except for the police, who are slightly inept. But there is one thing that is really bad. At the end, for those whose brain is just simply not there, one of the characters states the bleeding obvious of the plot to explain it all. Any hint of subtly is thrown out the window! I would like think that it shows how dumb the gang member who said it was, but I fear that it was directed at the viewer, and it really detracted from the film enjoyment.

Black Sheep (7)

This is a great black comedy where murder, mayhem, and most of all, gore, are told in a tale of ludicrous comedy. I must admit some biasness, I have a fondness for New Zealand, and so I probably look favourably upon NZ films like this one. But this one was truly funny. It's a 7 (from the very first jokes I was laughing, like the activist environmentalist commenting about a salmon farm, "Hey, those fish died free!"), but you have to be in the mood for some fun silliness.

Henry, who decades after his his brother butchered a pet sheep and scared him creating his sheep-phobia, returns to his father's farm to sell his half of the farm to his brother. However, his brother is experimenting with genetic engineered sheep turns his docile flock into killing Franken-sheep. Those that are not killed, are turned into ware-sheep monsters, which is a interesting side effect that the farm scientists are fascinated by!

Henry's brother, Angus, tries to sell his new breed of sheep but when all the buyers are attacked, he flees. Henry, Tucker, a farm worker, and Experience, another environmentalism must battle their away across the farm to raise the alarm, and stop any sheep, and Angus, from escaping to the rest of the country.

I liked this for it's jokes (particularly the ones from new-age eco-friendly environmentalist Experience) and also for the New Zealand slang (such as "Rattle your dags"). I also liked how one of the most dumbest and docile animals is transformed in rampaging deadly hunter deadly killers. The warm relationship between the three heroes and slightly flat acting fit it perfectly. And while there is blood and gore, this is a good comedy. "Mint sauce" - ahahah!

The Colditz Story (4)

This is simply just bad - the only thing that is not is the acting. This escape film of 1955 is probably escapism, a slight jump into fantasy for those who survived WWII, because I find it all very hard to believe. I rate this a 4 (it is not engrossed, so have a conversation, and catch up on your email during it).

English, Dutch, French and Polish nationals during WWII are imprisoned in an old medieval castle that is supposed to be inescapable. While other prison populations would just wait the war out (or die), inside Colditz there is so much escape activity going on that that escape committees are organised so that plans don't collide. Pat Reid leads the English contingent but has some conflict with their highest officer, Colonel Richmond. A tunnelling effort fails when it's collapse causes it to be discovered, a vault over the wall ends in a death (just to show that it's serious I guess), the climax is an escape disguised as German officers during a stage performance put on the by the prisoners.

It seems that prison life inside Colditz is much better than the war life outside - they are treated well, feed, not abused, and as long as they are not escaping, they are not shot. So why try to escape? They even get to put on stage shows for their own amusement! There is a lot of stiff upper lip and "for the country" mentality, and lots of class-ism going on in this film that I just find comically unbelievable. The school boyish fun and stereotypical characters, right down do the bumbling overweight German guard, are just tiring and I can't relate to a single one of them. There are some moments of good filming, but it is not outstanding. The only thing is good is the acting - even though the dialogue often scrapes painful into my ears, I put that down the classes being portrayed. If I had been born 50 years earlier and live in England to experience such people, then it probably would have been a much more enjoyable film, but to me, it was of another planet.